Not sure what I think of Pommery Pink’s new label. Is it so kitsch as to be acceptable, or just out and out naff? Comments from women – surely the intended audience – I’ve asked haven’t been exactly positive. The wine itself is no great shakes, but then again flavour doesn’t really have a great deal of influence on wine sales – the words Tail and Yellow spring to mind… Put it this way, there’s usually little problem in finishing bottles of Champagne here, but this was opened on Sunday, and there’s still half of it left. If you’ve never cleaned a loo with Champagne, you haven’t lived. OK, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I remember some particularly foul fizz that I used instead of Toilet Duck – stubborn stains had no chance against the onslaught of crap flavours and bubbles.